As we linger in this bone-deep cold of early 2026, the calendar about to turn its page into February, I find I am treasuring the concept of softness and cozy more and more. I personally refuse to complain about winter being cold (it would simply be hypocritical of me), but that does not mean that I cannot appreciate my spaces of warmth and safety.

I do believe, however, that I have always desired hygge and coziness. As a child, I can recall trying to capture those idyllic, cozy atmospheres that I found in books like Eight Cousins or Anne of Green Gables.

I loved swirly skirts and my lace-up ankle boots, circa 1996. I felt very Victorian when I wore them together.

When the electricity went out, I would “play Jo” and journal by candle and moonlight at my desk.

I recall “having teatime” all by myself with a lovely cup of hot chocolate and some bread and butter (originally inspired by the tea-party-on-the-ceiling scene in Mary Poppins).

I’ve also always loved to make my spaces comfortable. In graduate school, when my roommate moved out, I rearranged the room to create more of a lounge area. I took the extra bed and turned it into a lounge/couch of sorts where I could sit and read or watch TV. This way I did not feel like I had to be either at my desk working all the time or sleeping.

I suppose I have always been chasing cozy, to be able to feel utterly at home: in my own space, in my own clothing, in my own skin. It has been the work of almost 43 years but now I can truly say that I am utterly enjoying the journey.

Currently bows are my entire personality. Book, cup, headband, hair clips, sweater, dress…if it has a bow on it, I want it. To me, it feels like the ultimate expression of the femininity and girlishness that has always been a core part of me, even when I tried to bury it oh so deep down. Now in my feral forties, I am ecstatically embracing my “soft girl era” (which has, honestly, always been there) and giving that side of myself all the love that it so richly deserves.

And everyone around me (including my poor students) will just have to live with it. 🎀