Today, as I drove home from Planet Fitness, I began to sing through my Glee playlist on iTunes. One of the songs I came across was Gwyneth Paltrow and the Glee cast’s rendition of Fleetwood Mac’s “Landslide”. I love Glee’s arrangement of this song and, as I sang alone in the car, a curious thought struck me.

“This could really be my song for 2014.”

In case you are curious, here are the lyrics:

Took my love and I took it down
Climbed a mountain and I turned around
And I saw my reflection in the snow covered hills
Well, the landslide brought me down

Oh, mirror in the sky, what is love?
Can the child within my heart rise above?
Can I sail through the changing ocean tides?
Can I handle the seasons of my life?

Well, I’ve been afraid of changin’
‘Cause I’ve built my life around you
But time makes bolder, children get older
I’m getting older too, well

Well, I’ve been afraid of changin’
‘Cause I’ve built my life around you
But time makes bolder, children get older
I’m getting older too, well, I’m getting older too

So take this love and take it down
Yeah, and if you climb a mountain and you turn around
And if you see my reflection in the snow covered hills
Well, the landslide brought down

And if you see my reflection in the snow covered hills
Well maybe, well maybe, well maybe
The landslide will bring you down

There have been several changing tides and seasons of life that I have weathered through this year and, sometimes, it felt like I was going to be buried by the landslides of emotion, worry, change, etc. But what I have come to realize is that those “landslides” had a far more profound purpose than just causing me stress or worry. Those landslides served to bring me down, yes, but not in the way that you’d think. Those landslides forced me to reconsider my life, my position, my beliefs, my morals, the realities surrounding those particular situations, the reasons behind them, and the steps that I could take forward. They drove home the reality that I could let my emotions lead me around by the nose OR I could take a moment, breathe, be honest, and then make a decision as to my next steps, reactions, etc. So, instead of being “brought down” in the negative sense (brought low), I felt more that I was being brought back to earth, rooted, and given a chance to be better – a better mother, a better wife, a better friend, a better person.

Time has indeed made me bolder, I think. I am not a person who will ever consider herself one of the boldest around, but I am far more so than I used to be and am glad for it. Bolder with my heart, with my faith, with my talents.

This has been a year of change and seasons, yes, it but has also been one of being more deeply rooted and grounded and grown stronger. And, if I may say so, I’m rather proud of myself for that.